Thursday, January 19, 2006

Rip It Out

I really have no idea why I feel like this is important enough that I have to share this, but you know, my middle name is 'sharing equals caring', which is why I don't own many monogrammed items.

Early today I went to the prosthesist's to give the C LEG™ a once around the, um, small room. Walking walking walking. I had to try so hard to remember all the little details that you never have to think about to walk naturally. I'd walk, turn, walk and sit down. Also, the socket that the residual limb fits into is plastic-y and tight-fitting so I have to slop a lot of limb lotion (which might be the actual brand name) all over it to be able to pack it all into the socket. Then once the air is pushed out I turn a knob on the bottom of the socket and the leg is held in place by suction.

However.

Just by moving around normally and my limb changing in shape as I move, I end up with a lot of air pockets inside the socket, so when I stand or sit? Out rips the wettest, loudest fart noise I've ever heard outside of a Third-Grade classroom. PHHHHHHRRRRRAAAAPPPP! PHHHHHHRRRRRAAAAPPPP! PHHHHHHRRRRRAAAAPPPP! My own personal soundtrack. Like I don't feel embarrassed enough. On the up side, I know how to endlessly amuse my ten year-old and eight year-old cousins.

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